Crazy

Aerosmith. I always liked them for some reason. A ballad like "Crazy" makes me feel justified in that (here's the director's cut of the vid). Besides some of their lyrics are just plain funny. In Crazy you have the line

“You're packing up your stuff & talking like it's tough & telling me it's time to go
But I know you ain't wearing nothing underneath that overcoat & it's all for show"

K, funny in a slightly twisted way, but like I have room to talk.

Another line that cracked me up for no discernible reason - from the song Pink (here's the vid)

"Pink is like red but not quite"

Ah.

Anyway A very touching part of "Crazy" is where Tyler sings a line & the melody is doubled on guitar. Just four words - "I need your love".

I never made any pretense that I was all wise & all knowing int he realm of relationships. I know a little & I really do try my best to guess what's missing but I admit to a certain cluelessness. A lot of what I do know comes from lyrics. It sounds odd but if you look in the right spots there's some wisdom in songs. After all most musicians are an emotional lot & try to stay in touch with things of this nature, so it's no wonder than once in a while someone will say something deep, or touching or even correct.

Need though.

I have a very strict definition of need. In short the only things I need are food, water & shelter. Everything else is a want, not a need. But perhaps when it comes to relationships I'm mistaken.

One of the funny things to me is that the majority of love songs are based upon co-dependent relationships. The word "need" typifies it but sometimes there are more subtle clues. Still it's usually a "need' based perspective. sure, there are songs about "wanting" someone but I think most deal with "need".

So is it possible to "need" someone & not be co-dependent?

My mother was with her husband from sometime in the early 80's till this past May. She died & it tore him up something fierce. Now truth be told I always thought he was an ass & haven't spoke to him since my mother passed, but I won't deny his pain. Still from what I saw of his behavior he was co-dependent on her.

In general I've never liked the co-dependency of relationships. It's alluring at times; there's no security like knowing the other person doesn't think they can get by without you - but it's not that good for all involved from what I've seen. Still it works for some people & even makes them happy.

Going back to my strict definition of need I don't think I have ever thought I couldn't live without a specific person. I've thought I'd be eternally miserable without some of my ex g/f's when we busted up, but nothing ever met my definition of need.

Want is another topic altogether. There have been some women I've wanted so badly that it caused pain. & I don't mean just wanting to sleep with them; I mean wanting them in my life. But where does want become so strong that it's an emotional need? & can it be done without having the disadvantages of co-dependency?