GAvO

She has been a constant in my life since we met. A very bright spot in a world that at times is not so dark.

In 1990 I was a few days late for the beginning of class. I was working construction over the summer & you tend to lose track of dates. In any case GAvO was in my music theory class. She was quiet & shy but friendly at the same time. & she was a helluva guitar player. She had more talent than I did but her shyness kept folks from seeing that. Plus she impressed me with her answer when some guy asked if she had any kids. She looked coyly around & said, “None that I know about”.

We started hanging out & after a few months I started to care for her. She cared for me too but she did not feel any sort of attraction to me. I asked her out for Valentines Day in 1991 & she accepted. She was the first (& one of the very few) ladies I've taken out on Valentines Day. I took her to my favorite fish camp & had sent her flowers. After dinner I dropped her off at her apartment & tried to kiss her. She turned her head & gave a sort of nervous giggle. I kind of figured then that it wasn't going to happen. A few days later we discussed the situation & she told me that she didn't feel an attraction for me & in fact was infatuated with someone else.

We didn't speak for about a month after that but then we started to hang out again. In fact we would talk almost every day. We became best friends.

She moved away to finish her degree. By that time I had dropped school & was gigging again. But we stayed in touch, albeit not that frequently (she was a bit on the slack side). Any time of duress that I can recall I went running to her, at least for a long time. In 1992 when my grandmother passed I went to see her. In 1993 when AS got married & my attempts to stop the wedding failed I drove to see her. In 1995 when I was getting stressed out by my band I went to see her. In 1997 when things had fallen all to hell with JD she came to see me. In 98 we were roommates at the beach & after I moved out in 1999 we would still hang out quite a bit. She was the last person I went to see before I left the state in 2001.

I hadn't talked to her much for a few years but when KS & I split she was on the phone anytime I called. When Frankie was not doing well she was always available to talk. She drove a few hours to meet me as I passed near her in early 2006 on my way to see Frankie. She's just always been someone whose caring I never doubted.

At times I've regretted that she never felt an attraction for me but I can't feel too bad considering the caring she's given me over the years. & I've done as much as I could to return the favor, albeit I doubt I'll ever settle the debt. For the record though I don't think I've ever lost the attraction I felt for her & there have been quite a few times where I'd have been cool with trying to work something out romantically with her. But I think I've just accepted the fact that she never wanted anything from me of a non-platonic nature.

She's probably been around on more of my b-day's than anyone else. I've hung out with her on New Year's Eve, Valentines Day, her b-day & just about every other occasion on the calendar that I gave a damn about. Oddly enough she doesn't call me on my b-day when we're living in different towns even though I don't think I've missed calling her on one of hers. If she was within an hours' drive she'd be over to see me but otherwise she just has a drink or twelve while listening to Queensryche & thinks of me for a minute or two. With her I let that slide because I know she cares.

I've known the girl coming up on 16 years & while we've had a difference or two she's always made my world a bit brighter than it would have been. She has faults & flaws like anyone else, but for me they don't diminish whatever the hell it is that she is to me.

It's not the greatest or most concise description of her, but I don't think I could give a good enough account of how I see her. Just settle for this brief account of why I see her the way I do.